Reflections – Page 4 – Black Sh33p's Corner

by Shannon Lee

For a long time, I didn’t fully understand the weight of what I endured as a child. The abuse was subtle in ways, often wrapped in silence and neglect, leaving me feeling unseen and unheard. Growing up secluded from the world, I missed out on crucial social experiences. The kind that helps shape how we connect, trust, and thrive among others.

It wasn’t until my early twenties that I realized how much of my struggle to navigate social spaces came from this sheltered isolation. Learning to communicate, to read emotions, and to build relationships felt like starting from zero. The trauma of being protected beyond reason created a barrier, not a shield – that left me vulnerable and confused.

This early realization was painful but necessary. It opened the door to understanding myself more deeply and to beginning a healing journey that I’m still on today.

The Dangers of Over-Sheltering and Micro-Parenting

Being overly sheltered or micro-parented can feel like safety on the surface, but underneath, it builds walls that trap and limit. Especially in some Christian households, fear often drives parenting styles that control and restrict children’s experiences beyond what’s healthy.

This kind of parenting creates barriers to independence and confidence, making it hard for kids to trust their own judgment or handle life’s challenges. When every step is monitored and every decision questioned, children grow up uncertain of their own abilities and fearful of making mistakes.

Instead of fostering growth, over-sheltering can cause long-term damage to emotional resilience and social skills. It isolates children from the world they need to learn from, ultimately making adulthood more daunting than it has to be.

The Harm in Labeling Spiritual Gifts as Demonic

For many of us, especially in religious households, our natural gifts, the intuition, creativity, and spiritual sensitivities, were often misunderstood or feared. I, like many others, was told these gifts were signs of demons or evil, leading to shame and confusion.

Being told your gifts are “demonic,” or that some has “voodoo” on you can deeply damage your mental and emotional well-being. It forces you to reject parts of yourself that are meant to be embraced, causing inner conflict and making it difficult to distinguish what’s real from what’s fear or false belief.

Suppressing these gifts doesn’t make them disappear; instead, it can cause anxiety, depression, and a fragmented sense of self. Healing starts when we reclaim our gifts and recognize them as sources of strength, clarity, and connection.

The Power of Embracing Our Gifts

Our gifts, whether spiritual, creative, or intuitive, are not curses to fear but treasures to nurture. When we embrace these parts of ourselves, we unlock healing, clarity, and a deeper connection to who we truly are.

Allowing children (and ourselves) to explore and express their unique gifts is vital for building self-worth and resilience. It teaches us to trust our inner voice and navigate life with confidence, even when the path feels uncertain.

This space is a call to parents, communities, and individuals alike: support and celebrate your gifts. Break free from old fears and let your light shine unapologetically.

Healing and Moving Forward

Healing is a journey! Often long, sometimes messy, but always powerful. Reclaiming your gifts and your voice takes courage and patience. It means forgiving the past, setting boundaries, and choosing to walk your path with intention and self-love.

For those still navigating similar struggles, know you’re not alone. Finding community and support can make all the difference. Together, we can break cycles, build strength, and celebrate every step of growth.